my friend: hey can i get some advice on something
me who got a matching tattoo with a girl on our first and only date: yeah sure
Your regular reminder that a corgi crossed with any other breed just ends up looking like a corgi disguised as the other dog.
My dad and I went to a restaurant and the waiter pointed at the QR code on the wall and said “thats our menu” and left and my dad looked at it really close and said “Is this some kind of joke”
emotionally, if the corner of my fitted sheet pops up one more time, i will die
living with your parents is fun cause it’s free except for the small cost of your mental wellbeing
News – Just 17 Hilarious Tweets From This Weekend Only